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Thread: Smack Talk

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    Smack Talk

    In good fun, what do you say to that friend who can't catch a fish?

    I recently spent a total of nearly 8 hours fishing in the Garrison Dam tailrace, catching a grand total of one carp.

    We've all heard "oh, you should have been here last week" or "man, next week is gonna be good".

    But people were catching fish while I was there.

    I'm not stupid, I don't lack equipment, and I don't give up easily, but really, wow..

    Anyhow, I've been told that I suck at catching fish, and that it's a Lack of "effin" talent (LOFT - that's a new one for me - thanks Capt Ahab)

    How do you needle the poor bastage who can't catch a fish?

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    "Remember that one time, like 2 minutes ago, when I caught that fish? It was awesome, you should try it sometime."

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    "You're a GREAT net man...keep sticking to what you're good at!"

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    "Dude, you doing it all wrong"

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    Sprint Car Racing, Hunting and Fishing are my drugs of choice.

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    Your not holding your tongue right.

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    Wash your hands...is the first thing I tell em

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    A little help here, didn't think I was going to have to do all the work today.

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    “People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care”
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    a long time ago, while pitching up into weeds a buddy caught a few nice ones but all I was doing was snagging weeds. While I was picking the weeds off my lure he says "oh good, you got some salad to go with the meat". At the time I didn't find it amusing.

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    More often than not I find myself reminding people that "if you catch more/bigger fish than your guide and boat owner/operator, you best be prepared to swim home". My kids think I'm kidding.

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    "Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself." Mark Twain, speaking on Congress.

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    These are all great. Keep 'em comin'. Someday I'm gonna haul them out and mouth off, and then get punched in the neck.

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    I keep it simple and just call dirtymike a dickbag or something because he catches more fish than me pitching jigs

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wags2.0 View Post
    I keep it simple and just call dirtymike a dickbag or something because he catches more fish than me pitching jigs
    You could have shirts made. "Dirtymike is a dickbag".

    Or have stickers made, to hand out to the "fishing challenged" like myself.

    Air fresheners? Christmas ornaments? Spatulas..?

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    I like to send pictures of full limits when I know a guy is having a bad day

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    Are you tending your pole properly?

    - - - Updated - - -

    Holding a fish: “Hey, this is what they look like”

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    Quote Originally Posted by RustyTackleBox View Post
    I like to send pictures of full limits when I know a guy is having a bad day
    PM'd you my cell number.

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    It's pretty rare that I fish out of someone else's boat anymore. That being the case, I'm typically happiest when my passengers are catching fish as that means I'm doing my job to get them in the right situation. I had 1 #5 blue jointed shad rap w/red bill on a day in late June this summer, and the fish were crushing that lure. They'd hit others too, but the blue/red thing was on fire. Rather than giving my guest a bunch of crap, I pulled the lure off my line and attached it to his.

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    When in trouble or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.

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    Anything about Axe body spray works

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    Norm Dahl
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    As long as someone is catching fish, It's a good day in my book.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wags2.0 View Post
    I keep it simple and just call dirtymike a dickbag or something because he catches more fish than me pitching jigs
    Your rippin rap game is much stronger than mine.

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    <img src=http://nodakangler.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=229&dateline=1429714759 border=0 alt= />
    NPAA #939

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    When I catch the first fish...


    - - - Updated - - -

    When I'm 10-20 fish ahead, start talking about how sensitive my Walmart rod is.

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