DirtyMike Jr

[Yoby]

Im actually a chiro and he's got his first adjustment already. Wife sent me home for the night so I'm going to swing by sams club in the morning and pick up the roomba she's been eyeing.

I knew you were, had to give you a little hard time since you won't get much sleep for a month or two (unless your wife lets you). Again Congrats. Baby's can be fun, but its watching them grow that is largely rewarding for me.

 

[Vollmer]

 

[MuskyManiac]

Congrats! Get her the vacuum by all means, but I would also get something just for her, perhaps a necklace or earrings with the baby's birthstone.

There's your unsolicited advice for the day, haha! Congrats again!

 

[guywhofishes]

Dirty - you already gave her the gift of your superior spawn, I'd say you can relax now.

Humans, like many mammal species, do best when the males stay out of the way unless/until food supply, defense, discipline, or entertainment are required. (Think male lions)

don't fight the ways of nature

you are welcome

 

[Sluggo]

I'm late to the party, darn work always getting in the way, but a big CONGRATS anyway!

 

[Retired Educator]

Yes, your life has changed. The good news is that "that's not a bad thing." Nothing more enjoyable than fatherhood. Perhaps being a grandpa is, but they are close. Enjoy every minute and I do think that the saying "the more the merrier" is true for children.

 

[Crankn]

Congratulations!

 

[Allen]

A wife, a kid, and a dog. How will you ever find time to fish?

Congrats man, it won't take long at all and you'll forget all about your previous life.

 

[NodakBuckeye]

Excellent! Congrats! Don't blink, I just gave my son his 10 birthday spanks this morning, goes fast. If your wife is like mine she likes the gifts of utlitarian items better than sparklies. She would rather have something she has been eyeing but has not pulled the trigger. If it is something that makes life easier for her, has dropped hints and you get it after some more subtle and not so subtle hints... winner.

 

[BrokenBackJack]

Get a baby sitter and take your bride out once a week. Good for both of you and also good for the child as they learn about anxiety issues with Mom and Dad leaving but it is OK as they will be coming back.
Also i have said this many times be a good parent and teach them right from wrong and wrong things have consequences, teach them to honor and respect, and to be polite. Parenting is first, being their best friend will come later in life when they are adults. There is a BIG difference in the two and you must keep them straight.
When you have to discipline it hurts you too but this is OK and they will love you afterwards too.
Again congrats!

 

[Biglunch]

Congrats, its a wild ride. Don't have as much advise as my son is only 5 months old but I do know it seems to get easier. I was pretty much no help the first few months but im learning.

 

[Captain Ahab]

Dirty - you already gave her the gift of your superior spawn, I'd say you can relax now.

Humans, like many mammal species, do best when the males stay out of the way unless/until food supply, defense, discipline, or entertainment are required. (Think male lions)

don't fight the ways of nature

you are welcome

I bought my wife a gun on delivery day. I still "site it in" for her here and there.

 

[Rowdie]

Get a baby sitter and take your bride out once a week. Good for both of you and also good for the child as they learn about anxiety issues with Mom and Dad leaving but it is OK as they will be coming back.
Also i have said this many times be a good parent and teach them right from wrong and wrong things have consequences, teach them to honor and respect, and to be polite. Parenting is first, being their best friend will come later in life when they are adults. There is a BIG difference in the two and you must keep them straight.
When you have to discipline it hurts you too but this is OK and they will love you afterwards too.
Again congrats!

As a teacher, if ALL parents would focus on teaching their kids these things, WITH CONSSEQUENCES, this world would be a much better place. Should start seeing that name winning wrestling tourney's in a dozen+ years

 

[GSP]

Congrats DM!

 

[johnr]

Is she pregnant again yet?....jk

If the baby stinks like a fart, its not a fart, hand him off immediately to the mother, mother in law, your own mother, or any other woman that might be in the general vicinity...haha.

Poop happens, and it happens a damn lot with little fella's

 

[guywhofishes]

Is she pregnant again yet?....jk

If the baby stinks like a fart, its not a fart, hand him off immediately to the mother, mother in law, your own mother, or any other woman that might be in the general vicinity...haha.

Poop happens, and it happens a damn lot with little fella's

zesty advice!

First hint of odor find a doting female who wants "time" with junior. Hee hee. I changed my daughter only a dozen times or so.

 

[deleted_account]

sack up and change your kids diaper. Sheesh

Congrats again my friend! Dirtymike and the gang grew by 1 yesterday. Im gonna go rub my weiner on something with much zest in celebration!

 

[johnr]

sack up and change your kids diaper. Sheesh

Congrats again my friend! Dirtymike and the gang grew by 1 yesterday. Im gonna go rub my weiner on something with much zest in celebration!

Might I suggest that sacking up is what you do to make the lady folk do the diaper change.

Never do a womans work if there is a woman around somewhere to do it...haha

4 kids, 2 grandkids, 15+ niece and nephew combo's, on and on. I can count on one hand, likely one finger how many diapers I have handled.

mrs johnr takes care of the human poop, I get the cat box, dog kennel, back yard, or anywhere that these beasts of mine might deuce.

 

[guywhofishes]

Wags - diaper changing expert - ha ha. Big talker.

- - - Updated - - -

Don't be a misogynist... taking away the womenfolks' favorite activities - doting on babies - is cruel. Let them change the lil stinker - they LOVE it.

 

[deleted_account]

Wags - diaper changing expert - ha ha. Big talker.

- - - Updated - - -

Don't be a misogynist... taking away the womenfolks' favorite activities - doting on babies - is cruel. Let them change the lil stinker - they LOVE it.

i had to babysit siblings (significantly younger) and changed many a diaper. #everybodypoops