Most Redneck thing you've done

[KDM]

I'll start. There are so so many, but this one stands out in my memory. I'll set the scene. Take early college age pursuers of idiocy (including yours truly), spring time flooded ditches full of carp and suckers, and a few beers. Add sections of "borrowed" chain link fence and put them across the ditch to the bottom about 100 yards apart. Throw in potato forks, a good buzz, shallow muddy water, a mid 50 degree day, and there you have it. Wet, muddy, Fish Stink, and muck covered lunatics laughing and splashing around chasing fish in some random ditch. What a BLAST!!!!!! Oh and by the way, fish don't stay on a potato fork worth a shrite. Grin!

 

[Tikka280ai]

This feels alot like a game and fish sting operation!!!

 

[KDM]

HaHaHa!! Not much different than bow fishermen filling barrels full of carp, but I can see your point.

 

[Obi-Wan]

Waterskiing the McClusky canal in blue jeans and wearing a motorcycle helmet While being pulled by a pickup.

 

[luvcatchingbass]

Birthday landed on a Friday one year and didn't have any plans so picked up a 1.75 of Pendelton for myself. Drinks were going good, grilled up some good food and decided to have a bonfire.
Stoked up the fire by pouring gas on it from a 1gal can. After the poof of fire turn to my wife and buddy and they are yelling something at me. End of the gas can had a little flame like a candle so I nonchalantly blow the flame out and said problem solved or something stupid I'm guessing. They took the gas can away from me after that.
Next morning found my 1.75 bottle of Pendalton that was full the night before only had about 2in of booze in the bottom left, pretty sure it was a good birthday night, still had my eye brows at least

 

[Zogman]

Statute of limitations has run out. In the early 60's used to call the warden tell there were some people shinning deer in one corner of the county. Then a couple of us would proceed to shine Jackrabbits about 50 miles away. Way too much fun.

 

[svnmag]

I'm sure there's many dumbass I haven't pulled up: In 4th or 5th grade I got an Indian Spirit 25lb compound bow complete with 6 wooden arrows for Christmas. The next morning I was up at sunrise and went out in rubber boots and long johns to shoot the thing. My sister got a Barbie Van and the box was filled with all the wrappers, etc.

I got about 15yds away and let fly at the box. I only missed by 4 feet. In brief: In short order I lost 5 arrows in the woods under the snow and broke one in half when it hit a wild cherry tree. Being so pissed; it's a wonder I didn't have a stroke; I knocked about 8in of the damn arrow. I walked point blank to the box, drew and released. No hole in the box. Confused, I then looked at my left hand to the sight of red, white and blue fletching imbedded in the meat of my thumb. The rest exited my palm, glanced off the grip and miraculously passed between the 3rd and 4th finger.

Woke Mom up with this hand in front of her face... this incident predicted my archery skill in future attempts. Not a fan. I've never shot at an animal with a bow; I'll tell you what.

One more--Road work was being conducted behind the house one winter. Back in those days WV had winters. Not ND type but damn good enough...2ft of snow on the ground and weeks in the teens during the day. So...this fine weekend afternoon I noticed a temporary stop sign was still erected and decided it needed a hole. I went back in the house to pump the trusty 880 full of warm air.

Once 3ft in front of the enemy sign; I chambered a BB and BWANG. I was dressed in coveralls and a heavy coat. The BB bounced back, hitting me just below the sternum with enough force and pain to drop me on one knee. Bwang. Shit.

I didn't watch "A Christmas Story" until around '94. These experiences made Ralphie my brother.

That is all.

 

[LBrandt]

Filling baby food jars full of rocks with a silver salute tucked inside with the fuse sticking out the cover just enough to light. Chum baiting sunfish over the side of my cousins old wood boat then droping the baby food jar lit over the side. Like 60 years ago. LB

 

[Davey Crockett]

Fun topic . It started with riding on an aluminum shovel behind horses and ditch skiing behind cars and getting in a tractor tire and rolling down a big hill by our house .

 

[lunkerslayer]

I grew up with a some local kids that would ski behind the horse, first it was a snowmobile but the horse was much better less snow would get kicked up to blind you.
Also we would make bombs with firecrackers and gun powder made out of pvc pipe, 2 liter jugs fill with dry ice or drano and aluminum foil
One farmer friend would come pick us up in the farm truck and we would shoot gophers and squirrels out of the back of the box. I shot up so many stop signs until we got turned in. No mail boxes though since that was done prior and we knew not to mess with those.
I used a fake laminated driver's license for a whole year until I forgot to take out my wallet in the wash and it peeled open the laminate and got arrested for altercation of a dl and had to get bailed out of the minot city jail.
Oh I could go on but those will do

 

[NodakBob]

Gawd so many so long ago, had to think about it for awhile… best one was 45 years ago a friend bought an Olds 98 4door with a 455 to make into a demo derby car. First order of business was how do we remove all the windows ha ha…he was military and “checked out” an m16 from the armory with 2000 rounds. We drove to Glenco bottoms gun range to test fire the gun ( we each got to shoot a 30? Round clip with strict orders “only on single shot”) I was last one up out of four of us and bored, so I went full auto…the other guys on the firing line freaked and nearly dropped all their guns…so off we went into the woods where we shot out all the windows and doors, we also all had our motorcycle helmets on while the driver proceeded to tear the back bumper and door handles off with sideswiped trees and whoopdeedoos. We pulled out of the woods onto a road where some Bowhunters were doing deer drives…they all had their mouths wide open gawking at us as we drove by with no windows or exhaust system and full of bullet holes…with our helmets still on.

 

[svnmag]

Pard from Iowa told me this tale: He was working clearing a field and when just before the brush pile was lit he found one of those metal 5gal tar cans with the metal tabs on the lid. He filled it about a quarter way with gasoline and sealed the top. When the fire first started to catch he threw the bucket on top of the pile, drove atop a hill about a 1/2 mile away and opened some beers.

In approximately a 1/2 hour the fire reached the top and enveloped the can. It burned a little while and just when he thought nothing was going to happen; he saw a massive fireball/plume of black smoke. He could see a shockwave coming at him and when it arrived the report could've/must've been heard for "freaking miles". "I was a damn half mile away and it was like a slap in the chest!" He said he waited two days in fear of a knock on his parent's door.

That is all.

 

[shorthairman]

Went pheasant hunting with my cousin who wasn’t much of a hunter and he quickly got bored…he decided it would be better to just drive his 2wd pickup through the CRP. Somehow he managed to get the back right tire off the ground trying to get back on the gravel road. We were going slow and the pickup just stopped with that wheel not touching the ground and spinning. I’m not a car guy, but something about power going to the tire with least resistance?? Anyway I decided I would stand on the bumper and bounce the pickup up and down to get the tire to touch, which was a good idea had I been able to get the tire to touch, problem was, try as I might I could only get it about 3” away from the ground. With the help of my cousin we could easily bounce on the bumper and get the tire to touch, however without the pickup in gear the tire wasn’t spinning and couldn’t drive forward. Sooo…put the pickup in gear, left the drivers door open, and both of us bounced until the tire caught and then the sprint was on! Luckily the case was short and we avoided having to report any vehicle damage to his dad.

 

[snow2]

Im not creative like youse guyz but i get the "your a red neck" if you use your unheated 3 season porch as your walkin cooler all winter...thats me...old lady shakes her head....

 

[Rowdie]

We had an old pontoon when I grew up. It was made of metal, not aluminum. It just had plywood floor and plywood fabricated storage box/benches on it. The steering was with cables and pulleys and when they would fail we'd just steer by sitting on one of the big boxes by motor and use our feet. Between that and jumping the selinoid with a pair of plires but still using it all summer the whole boat screamed redneck.

 

[LBrandt]

Im not creative like youse guyz but i get the "your a red neck" if you use your unheated 3 season porch as your walkin cooler all winter...thats me...old lady shakes her head....

Nothing wrong with that. I still do that. LB